Plans change. I don't always accept it well, but that's the fact of the matter. I'm not an impulsive person, and frequently I need time just to think over those changes so I can adjust. More than once I've had to remind myself that I can still have a great day even if I'm not able to do everything on my "to-do" list because we had to change our plans for the day.
But there are occasions when it's pretty easy to accept change. When Mom called me earlier this weekend and told me Grandpa wasn't doing very well, I made plans to come back early next weekend. I figured I would drive up Thursday and spend the day with her and Grandpa and stay for the rest of the weekend. But when she called me to say that she didn't think Grandpa would last til next weekend, I quickly and easily changed my plans. So I left early yesterday morning and drove back to Holton. My mom and her sisters were all already there as well as my sisters. I walked into Grandpa's room at the nursing home at 2:00 p.m. and around 2:20 p.m., he left this world. I was glad I got to tell him goodbye.
You know, I can't even be sad that Grandpa is gone because ever since Grandma died 6 years ago, he didn't want to be here anymore. He wanted to be with her, and now he is. I know he's happy now. Mom and her sisters said they could just imagine him and Grandma dancing together in heaven - they loved to dance together. I'm a little jealous, too because Grandpa is getting to eat some of Grandma's amazing cooking again. She was a fabulous cook.
So that all the family can make it in, we're waiting until Saturday for the funeral. I went ahead and drove back home today and Taylor and I will go back together next Friday.
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| Donald Whitesell - Feb. 3, 2013. We will miss you. |
During hard times, it becomes so very clear how blessed our family is. Before the night was over we already had three families come by to bring food, offer their condolences and tell us that if we needed anything, all we needed to do was ask.
Not to mention the four little kids in our family can help bring joy to any situation. Kolden is ornery, but he cracks me up all the time. After coming back from the nursing home, Mom, Katie, Annie and I were going to take a short walk up in the pasture. Kolden was going to stay and help Dad feed the bucket calf. We had just started walking up the path, when I heard some very heavy breathing behind us. We turned around to see Kolden running as hard as his little four-year-old legs could carry him, sounding like a winded rhinoceros. As soon as we stop, he said, "I was trying to catch up to you, but you were going so fast!" When we asked Kolden if he told Grandpa where he was going, he paused to think as if the thought had never occurred to him. We called Dad to let him know he didn't have to worry in case he was wondering where his grandson went. Then for half the walk Kolden rode piggy back on me, hollering "giddy-up" and telling me that horses don't talk, whenever I started to say something.
Just seeing Rowan can melt your heart. That night she had these adorable little pig tails in, and later that evening when I put in "Brave" for them to watch, she wanted me to hold her because she was scared of "that mean bear." We ended up snuggling on the couch as we watched it. Kallan joined us, too, and we all curled up under a blanket together. Dawson is growing so quickly, but having a little, warm baby curl up by your neck can make any day better.
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| I may be biased, but I'm pretty sure you'd be hard pressed to find a cuter little girl with pigtails. |
At home, I now have three little babies of my own - baby calves. Cookie, Milo and Sweet (If you've seen the Disney movie Atlantis, you'll know where I got my names.) These some of the nicest little calves I've had in a while. I keep telling Taylor we need to build a small barn with pens so when they get bigger I can move them to larger pens and continue to keep them and wean them. :)
Western Kansas Fact: Even if it's different than where you grew up, Western Kansas can easily become your home. (Although as long as I am with Taylor, I could probably feel at home anywhere.)
A scripture that spoke to me recently was:
The Lord is close to everyone who prays to him, to all who truly pray to him. Psalm 145:18
God reminded me several days ago that He doesn't expect us to be perfect before He'll answer our prayers. We had a heifer that had trouble calving not too long ago, so we had to rope her and load her onto a trailer to take her to the vet. It took a while to get her, and the whole time I was praying that God would somehow help the calf survive until we could get it out. But at the same time, I kept thinking that we should have come out sooner to check on the heifers then maybe we could have caught her more quickly and had a better chance of saving the calf. Honestly by the time we got the heifer to the vet, I was all but certain the calf would be dead. But God doesn't expect us to be perfect. He just wants us to come to Him earnestly and pray to Him, inviting Him into our lives. He answered our prayers, and we pulled a live calf. Now they are both back out in the pasture and doing well.
Find joy in everything.
Lyndee
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